i shall not stop writing.

I just received this in my inbox and I can't help sharing this update here.

I must say that I've been a huge fan of Bobbi Brown since I started working in 1999. I became an even bigger fan of their lipsticks when I couldn't wear any other lipsticks ever since I was pregnant with my first born... I was told that hormonal changes would play tricks on a pregnant woman's body, especially to her skin but when it comes to my lips, I discovered that the changes were permanent. Those brands that I could wear before - drugstore cheap ones like Maybelline and L'oreal to luxury brands like Chanel, MAC, Dior, Estee Lauder, (even no-perfume Clinique lippies) whatever else, made my lips itch, swell and sometimes black (I kid you not).

Recently though, I managed to get reacquainted with a luxury brand after their new star product was launched. But it cost a tad RM109 for a stick and now that I've used it up, I am not sure if I'd want to spend that much on a gorgeous packaging that I would be discarding.

Oh, I was digressing. Back to the point - those days while I scout around for suitable lippies (which entailed plenty of wasted dough and throwing away lippies that were used only once or twice), I was happy to discover that Bobbi Brown's lipsticks were perfect for me... well, only the lipsticks and not their shimmery lip glosses, though. It was quite a relief too since the price wasn't too steep as they kept their packaging simple and modest.

Today, I am extremely excited to receive this info through email because one of my lipsticks is finished and I need a new one in a rosy/nudy shade.

i've always loved their natural shades, although i wish they also have something in dark brown or an intense crimson-dark choco shade

moisturising lippies seem to be the current trend in today's lip products...

There is also a special Mother's Day promotion running. So if you are a fan of Bobbi Brown or would like to discover them, do visit their local website.

Speaking of Mother's Day, I have to start working on an update which I've drafted in my head weeks ago. Anyways, have a good weekend and Happy Labour's Day :) although there will be no off day for me ;P

Having a reliable and speedy broadband connection is so important to a work-at-home-mom like me. I have plenty of things to do during the day taking care of the kids while juggling work at those stolen short intervals when my children are occupied with other stuff.

I am heavily dependent on internet connection almost 20 hours a day as my work hours are erratic, where I would normally go all out to focusing on my work after 10pm when most of the house chores are done and since I am based at home, I would always need to keep in touch with the ‘outside’ world like connecting with friends via twitter and facebook during the day just to keep me sane and not be an island.

My journey with the Malaysian broadband experience is aplenty but I have yet to try out P1 W1MAX. Found out about their new W1GGY but I guess I could only test it when their coverage reaches my section in the Kelana Jaya, PJ area. I have always been intrigued by P1’s innovation ever since they started their very catchy (and, somewhat controversial) advert (ahah!) on TV and I think they have somewhat captured a big interest to their services due to this fact.

And if you haven't yet checked them out, do visit their user-friendly website and look for the most suitable plan for you.

Well, for now, I could only hope that P1’ll arrive soon to my area. So for now, I would just have to be satisfied with whatever service that I’m using ☺

Project Alpha Season 2 is presented by Adidas Action 3 and supported by P1 and MAS.

Last Thursday, I managed to meet up with a friend whom I have not seen in years. Well, actually we did bump into each other many times in KLCC or the KL Convention Centre after I got married but those were brief hi's and ho's and not any proper meet. Therefore, we'd say that our proper meet was on my wedding day almost 3 years ago :)

I went over to see her at Pantai Hospital, Bangsar and I could see how vivacious she was despite having gone through a 28-hour labour and hoards of people visiting her non-stop. So, I would like to again congratulate Zeeda for the birth of her beautiful Zarya Jane Harris on 21 April 2010. She and her hubby had been waiting so long for her arrival and Alhamdulillah... the Almighty answered their prayers.

the proud umi and her baby... i didn't get to see Zarya that day as she was kept under observation due to jaundice.

I remembered how not too long ago, Zeeda was a little frustrated with her inability to conceive that she couldn't even read my blog anymore. I guess my happiness and excitement being pregnant with little jj just 6 months after my marriage made it difficult for her to accept.

Frankly, I would never really understand the feelings of people who has difficulties getting pregnant simply because I never experienced it myself. When it comes to a topic like this, it becomes very sensitive to a lot of women and the pressures of our society doesn't make it any easier for them.

When a friend shares with me on her frustrations on this issue, I would feel a little awkward because though I can be a good listener, I would feel extremely helpless. I do not know what to say to a friend to make her feel better because what I say might either be construed as totally insensitive (because I do not totally understand their situation) or my response sounds too cliched.

So, in view of this, one blogger has come up with the Trying to Conceive Club (TTC Club Malaysia) that acts as a forum or a one-stop platform for you to obtain information on fertility options or simply to express your frustrations to those who share the same predicament.

According to Little Mama, the founder of this Club, she is not a medical specialist to give advise on medical conditions but she has gone through most of the fertility methods available to her and she could probably offer some words of consolation where she acts as Counselor. I've read some of the threads in the forum and the information available are pretty decent and informative, down to the breakdown of costs in a private hospital and the steps of going through a fertility treatment.

I guess with this establishment, it can provide a more suitable channel for those in need of advise but do not really know where they should start. I believe the most important factor is the ability to share your feelings with those who truly understand and will not judge you while you also do not put a spot on friends who are just so scared to say anything for fear of saying the wrong things.

I say, kudos, to Little Mama for this effort. It may look small to some but I do believe it will be pretty helpful to those in need of opinions and guidance.

When I started to discover how little jj would focus on animation on TV like Wonderpets and especially those aired on Kelab Disney Malaysia on TV3, both the one and I considered including cartoon channels in our cable TV subscription.

Little jj was only around 16 months old then and she was very selective in the programmes that she would really watch. I only allowed Playhouse Disney for her and since then, she has started to discover many things she liked from the many quality and educational shows aired on the channel. She likes Handy Manny for the catchy tunes the tools and him would sing while performing their repair works and she'd laugh at Mr Lopart's antics and his pet cat, Fluffy; Special Agent Oso for the Paw Pilot’s tips and countdown; Safety Patrol for their annoying habit of scrutinising everything; Word World for their unique word-forms and usage of the alphabets; Chuggington for their upbeat tunes; the funny Ooh and Aah before any show starts; and others. Most importantly, her favourite would be Mickey Mouse Clubhouse for simply put, the star of the show – Mickey Mouse.

In conjunction with the public holiday this Saturday, 1 May 2010, Playhouse Disney on Astro’s Channel 613 will be airing their programmes with health-themed episodes from 9.30am to 1.30pm. Four special short-form prorammes like Mickey Mousekersize, Dance-a-lot Robot, Tasty Time with Zefronk and Adventures in Nutrition with Captain Carlos will also be shown throughout the day to add zest to this health campaign.

I guess this must have something to do with Michelle Obama’s initiative at fighting the increasing rate of child obesity and creating awareness about health as early as preschool years.

I know my little one totally enjoys the exercise sessions on Mickey Mousekersize. They make it look so much fun. And since dancing is a natural skill that a baby would develop, those catchy tunes that accompany all the activities always managed to capture her attention. She would move her body left to right and even twirls to the rhythm.

Tasty Time with ZeFronk is an animated short series where the host, ZeFronk, presents a healthy cook show from his house. Since she loves accompanying me to the kitchen, she is always fascinated with the show.

I look forward to discover the new show, Dance-A-Lot Robot, a combination of animation and live action programme where a robot teaches preschoolers simple original dance steps to the music of Devo’s Mark Mothersbaugh.

For those of you with a child who’s a little bit older, Adventures in Nutrition with Captain Carlos spotlights a six-year old boy who shows how healthy meals and regular physical activity make him feel like a superhero.

I guess since her usual Saturday’s class at Kizsports is cancelled due to the public holiday, it would be great to sit infront of the TV and do those activities with her at least for an hour or two in the morning. What better way to start inculcating healthy habits (if you haven’t yet!) when everyone is around this Labour Day ☺

Enjoy watching them with your little ones!

I received so many enquiries on what happened to the date I had with the one and I regret not being able to write sooner due to moi being tied up with work again and staring at the computer screen for any longer hours even to update the blog makes me nauseous ;P

I must say that we both had a blast. We had an awesome time together. Well, I guess we always had so much fun together except that these past years, most of our conversation always focused on what our children did, what they did not do, what they need, what they don't, well... you get my drift.

This time, thanks to one very useful advise from a friend, we refrained from talking about our kids during the short date and it felt almost like we were out on our first date.

I guess it felt that way for a fact that firstly, I have lost those few kilos (finally!) after more than a year, and... last Friday was the first time that I really dressed to kill for the date. So much so, that I did take the one's breath away hehe... this is not a perasan statement okeh, cos you can also read it here...

Well, I have never worn boots in any of our dates before though I am a fan of boots. And, knowing that the one does have his preference of what kind of clothes he likes me in, I decided to dress waaaay different than what he may think I would wear. The element of surprise is always a risk - you may strike the right chords yet it can even get disastrous. I am so glad, though, that my touch with fashion is still there although I did think I was a little 'over-doing' it - wearing a new pink top I've never worn, with a skirt that I haven't worn in years, paired with that long boots I bought on our UK trip a year back. He has never seen me in that combination and I was afraid that it may be a little too much for a Monday night hehe....

I started preparing so early, even. I went through my wardrobe as early as 3pm and I felt butterflies in my tummy. I got so darn excited that I hoped the one was feeling the same way. After all, we have not gone out alone together since the last 2 years and I was hoping that things will turn out really well.

Little jj didn't quite help as she didn't nap until half an hour before I was to drop her off at nenek's. And we all know that if she didn't get at least half an hour of sleep, she'd be a tough baby to handle. But I wasn't gonna be late since I would need to go through rush hour traffic into KL. Plus, little jj needs time to warm up at nenek's before I could leave her and I had to remain calm so that she couldn't sense any tension... I mean, babies could sense these kind of negative energy and they'd get tensed as well.

So, while she cried from the lack of sleep and was making it a little difficult for me, her favourite baby biscuits kept her happy... she munched on them while watching tv and my mom distracted her before I could leave silently.

When I reached Pavilion KL, I felt so many stares on me. I don't know if it was the outfit or whether my skirt was pulled up and people saw my underwear hehe... I had to look at my reflection many times in order to feel assured that I look normal...

It’s no joke. Some would complain after they complete their confinement period for the lack of privacy and inability to go on romantic dates alone with their husbands. For me and the one, it is probably 2 years since our last alone time together.

I guess it all lies in the fact that I was misinformed about some of the facts on the benefits of breastfeeding. And since I have been working from home, I have been always available and present at little jj's beck and call. That contributed to her totally rejecting milk in bottles and it caused her to be totally dependent and overly clingy on me.

It all got to quite a critical stage where I couldn’t have my proper rest and the one couldn’t even touch her, let alone contribute to any fatherly efforts like tucking her to bed. It would have been a very stressful situation if not for a very supportive husband and I guess he also appreciated the fact that he didn’t have to wake up for the night feeds at all (eheh!).

We had our ‘trial’ date during the one’s annual dinner when little jj was around 8 months old. I did an ‘induction course’ for her to get more familiar with atuk and nenek and in turn, like them. But you know, the fact that she didn’t even want anyone else to hold her then except for when daddy bathed her, I kind of expected that my dinner with him would be a short one.

We had the whole troop in our apartment (I was supposed to send her to atuk’s house but she cried non-stop there!) – atuk, nenek, abang, even her favourite cousins, Qilah and Nina, to play with her, entertain her and keep her occupied, while I quietly left the apartment and headed towards KL. The one was already waiting for me at the hotel and we had such a wonderful time chatting over cocktail. It felt like we were dating those years before being married. We talked the way we haven’t been able to since the arrival of little jj and we laughed the way we haven’t laughed, since little jj came into the world (I mean, laughing freely without having to control our volume...) ;)

As you can read here, I got a call around 9.30pm or so, just after we had dinner and I could clearly hear little jj’s loud cry in the background. Yes, she would do that even to daddy, then. My mom was terribly worried because it has been an hour since she didn’t stop crying and especially because little jj broke in heavy sweats that she wanted to take little jj to the clinic (hiks)! I told her that there’s nothing to worry about because yes, she sweats when she cries her lungs out and I got ready to leave the hotel. The one continued to stay on and told me to drive safely.

When I arrived half an hour later speeding my way through KL traffic, she was still crying out loud. I expected her to fall asleep while crying but apparently, she had waited for me to come home. Imagine to our amusement, she stopped immediately when she saw me home and she was laughing and playing about, all looking okay like nothing was wrong hehe…

So, yeah, that trial date totally didn’t work out the way we had hoped. And from then on, we never tried until end of last month when the one’s annual dinner made its way again. This time, little jj was around 20 months old and she has made plenty of positive progress because firstly, she has learnt to socialise from those weekly classes at Kizsports and secondly, she had just started to openly accept milk in the bottle. And that second point helped immensely when I was at my busiest that month, and having to attend meetings at night as frequent as three times a week. In those busy-ness, I was impressed at her confidence that she didn’t even seem to miss my absence when I once arrived home after 11pm.

I guess all that, plus the almost daily trips to nenek and atuk’s house after picking abang up from school, made her feel right at home there. Although she still needs time to warm up before atuk and nenek could even hug or kiss her, she no longer cried there and that gave me a chance to leave her with nenek when those rare need arise for me to attend serious meetings during the day.

But but but… the test would be the 2nd annual dinner that I would be attending with the one and we were both worried. She has never been without her mommy and daddy at night and I cringed to think what other tricks she has up her sleeves. I treat everything as sensitive so that the night could be a perfect one for us… and we were so happy to note that she totally passed the acid test! We arrived to pick her up around 11pm and she didn’t even cry. The entire house was dark because nenek wanted her to sleep but she went to doing her own stuff there and hugged me tight in joy when she saw me. Of course with mommy at her side, she didn’t feel that she needed to be friendly with atuk and nenek anymore ;P

Now, my mom had always made it clear to us (her children) that she never had any desires to take care of her grandchildren (especially babies) and that we were all responsible for our own children. But I guess, since she saw how much effort I put in raising little jj all on my own, and the fact that this little one is hard to please, it was probably a great sense of achievement for her when little jj accepts her and allows nenek to feed her/play with her. Of course, as always, I wouldn’t want to take advantage of my mom's willingness to babysit and that 2nd dinner we attended was cut short in order for us to next time ask for this kind of favour from her when we feel the need to have ‘alone’ time together.

As little jj has always been pretty unpredictable, I am again, keeping my fingers crossed for tomorrow… as we both will embark on our FIRST date after around 2 YEARS! Unfortunately, since it is a school day for our little munchkin, we may not be able to stretch tomorrow’s date for too many activities… so, we’re only making time for a romantic night at the movies where I am sure, dinner is included in the pitch darkness of the cinema. But that is romantic too, right? Hehe…

We used to catch a movie every other week those days but I am glad that we’re both not too demanding with the expectations that everything should be the same as it was before. Raising a family needs some sacrifices and what do you know… the time has finally came for us to finally go out again together.

Life always works its way to your advantage but you just wouldn’t know when that will happen. So, despite everything, I am glad that we're both extremely patient with little jj's quirks for us to appreciate what we could do again, tomorrow. So here’s hoping for more positive developments from now on, eh ☺

Do wish us luck, and for little jj to behave well with atuk & nenek, ya.

I love my E72. I think it is a dream phone for me, that can do everything I want of a phone and more.

I think those who’ve been reading me since years back would know my history with phones. Yes, I did stray to two other brands but I found that I would always come back to Nokia. It’s the best for me – you know what to expect of a Nokia phone, their capabilities are reputable, and what’s more important is that their application/software/programmes are easy to figure.

I’ve always wanted to own the E71. When I let go of my E90 to the one once I left the employment industry, the one thought I should try out those phones with amazing camera capabilities. Hence, he kept buying me phones with cameras in high megapixels but I found that my soul has always felt void (heh!). No matter how good those phones were, I still always admired the sleekness of the E71 with those shortcut work buttons I’ve always been familiar with when using the E90.

So, when the E72 reached our shores, I didn’t hesitate to dream and dream big ☺. Waddaya know, dreams did come true hehe… and so glad that I waited as the E72 is a marked improvement from its predecessor.

Seriously, I love it. Yes, the camera functions fall short from the N86 and N82 that I’ve used before, but all I wanted was a mobile ‘PC’ that I could use even in my visits to the loo (oopps!). I love the qwerty keyboard that fits just nicely in my small palms and I enjoy doing whatever typing work I needed to do on the move – be it while waiting for little jj's playschool to be over, or while waiting for my lunch to be served if I am eating out – whenever, wherever. Best of all, Nokia rewards all its E72 users with a free download of the latest Quickoffice application so that you are able to do your work on any Word, Excel and PowerPoint documents. That’s not all… I am able to get all my emails as well. Therefore, this toughcookie is well connected, in the most sleek and sexy way ☺

Don't get me started on its other useful functions like optical trackpad, free ovi suite, flash camera, video calls and more! It's many shortcut buttons is perfectly suited for busy mommies like me.

Now, ff you’re 18-30 years of age, loves a little challenge, is not currently employed and would want to get your hands on this charming mini-machine, Nokia is currently doing a reality 'recruitment' drive in the form of internships at four high-profile companies.

As I am way over the age limit (*sigh*) I am unable to submit my application. Hmmm… now, I do look 21 (ahahh!) but unfortunately, I am not able to falsify the details in my identity card *sigh again*

I reckon that the E72 will be put to a test – a highly fascinating one, too, as you will be armed with only the handsome gadget, taking on various challenges and a champion will be picked. As the champion, The Rookie will win a RM10,000 cash prize and bring home the E72. Well actually, all 12 interns chosen for this project will get to bring home the E72.

A valuable experience is offered in 4 corporate organisations who are leaders in their industries - Nokia, Universal Music, Standard Chartered Bank and 8TV. Registration closes 28 April 2010 and more details can be found here.

Oh, but to those of you who’s young at heart like me who are not able to participate in this project, you could still get a RM100 voucher against your purchase for a brand new E72 just by following all the webisodes and promotions. I would like to get it for the one but that gadget freak even surprised me when he decided to lay off his highly gadget-ey, high-tech HTC hero for the E72 this afternoon.

Hurrah to E72!

Recently, I’ve been plagued with a downturn in my energy to post new entries. In fact, I’ve drafted several but yet to click the ‘PUBLISH POST’ button because I am hell bent on posting something sincere from the heart and they may be too much info from the heart.

After blogging for what, 4-5 years now… I think I may have reached that cycle of most bloggers. I mean, many of them bloggers whom I was associated closely then, no longer blog actively. And like them, I am also more into tweeting for a quick, simple and hassle-free update, which is almost like writing a blog post, only much shorter.

Currently, many people blog for money. I can’t say much about it because as much as I felt that I would be leaving personal blogging for good, my dwindling spirits were suddenly given a little motivation boost (if not much) after looking at the continuous increase in the amount I am getting from Nuffnang. Hence, this blog post.

I dunno… apart from the fact that the normal lifecycle of a blogger is the contributing factor for this 'downturn', many things happening and moi not getting any younger, tends to make one get very much involved in life’s turn of events. And let’s face it, I’m a passionate person. I never really realised that until the one pointed that out to me and I have come to terms with that fact, that I am passionate in whatever issues I get myself involved with… while some are very positive, those negative ones are what kept my brain working because naturally, everyone would want to improve their life experiences and I would definitely want to improve myself – to be better and to not easily fall for people with so much negative energy in them because they easily pull others down with them.

Let’s face it. This passionate woman only has the best interests to those dear to her. But not everyone knows how to appreciate a passionate person. Some would come to me probably only for affirmation and you can’t get that from me every time since this toughcookie will only tell you the truth about what she feels from it all and we all know that the truth may not be that easy to accept. But, one should hear the truth… the fact that every one else gives you that loud cheer and agrees to everything you say or do, does not necessarily make them a good friend. Same goes to when a person does something against your will, doesn’t necessarily make them an enemy because from my experience in life, one may not be on your side because they are acting on your best interest – many a times you may not even realise it because one will only believe what one wants to believe. When that happens, it’s not their loss but yours.

I like to look at many different angles about any issues. Some say I think a lot but the one could vouch that my thinking allows me to foretell statements that do not tally which most often lead to us trapping insincere people in their own web of lies. I don’t know whether this comes from just seeing things from all angle or coupled with strong female instincts… or maybe, I am just a natural “lie detector”.

And that [partly] contributed to the dwindling mood to update my personal blog because I think I’ve come to a stage where I only want to divulge my personal views, daily experiences, etc. only to those who matters to me – those really dear to me, who sincerely loves to keep abreast with what’s happening with me lately… not those who just want to read to further scrutinise what’s happening in my life, and then make calls to their friends/officemates/parents back home/[insert whatever as you please], to gossip and talk behind my back.

Yup, I do not want to give that benefit to those undeserving.

But though it’s a dilemma of sorts, I guess after seeing an increase in the amount I got from Nuffnang though I haven’t been consistently updating, I just have to brush insignificant people aside and focus on what I have long been working on.

Guess at times, even the most passionate and positive person could get a little side-tracked.

Little jj is recovering from the slight fever she caught since Saturday. She was on and off with high temperature and I will always get a little concerned when it comes to her lack of appetite.

So today, at lunch, I get to see the strong resemblance of her daddy when her appetite sorta returned when I fed her hash browns from guess where - McD's! Like daddy like daughter, I'd say in this sense.

I do not want to spoil her diet because McD's is junk food to me and not a source of a healthy diet for a sick toddler. But another part of me wants her to eat so badly that it made me so happy to see her finally eat like she normally does. Once in awhile is ok then, eh?

I blame daddy for this love of McD hehe... so I guess it's true when they say that whatever you do when your partner is pregnant will most likely be presented in your little junior, be it good or bad :D

The only consolation in this case is that McD's is only downstairs and I liked the fact that little jj drinks lots and lots of water (just like mommy!) especially when she's under the weather.