i haven't stopped writing although i may have kinda stopped touching personal issues in here. but i promise to keep updating in a more professional level HERE.
Posted by toughcookie | Monday, May 3, 2010
I believe many bloggers are already aware about the recent development in the blogworld, particularly one that has escalated to a more serious note, involving legal procedures.
Having a blog does not give one the rights to write as he/she please. Yes, it is one's own blog and one feels they have the right to do whatever they wish as it is their own space but then again, one must realise that a blog can be read by the entire world, no matter where they are but most importantly, the world is already seemingly small and anyone can stumble upon your blog at any chance. Therefore, whatever you write may reach whomever anytime, anywhere.
These days, majority of bloggers incorporate their twitter account into their blogs and I think this is an even more powerful tool as one gets to communicate with their 'followers' and friends, still very visible to the entire world's population if one decides not to protect their tweets. Therefore, if you intend to gossip or tell a close friend, say, that you just fought with your husband, it is definitely not the most suitable platform unless you want your husband to read it and make the situation even worse.
Now, my point is, on the writing part. Most bloggers spill everything in their hearts into this small space because it is their space. But I think only a handful do not really spill everything when they're angry. Anger can be quite destructive because not only everyone else who doesn't know what's going on, will know the story eventually, but it also gives such a negative air/aura to your blog that not only you yourself will feel uncomfortable for letting such an entry linger at the top of your blog but readers mostly will also feel the same way. Furthermore, if indeed it was just a spur of the moment, the damage cannot be reversed. Fair and rational-minded readers would prefer not to know too much details if two individuals want to start a blog war, anyway..
Still, despite all that, I strongly feel that one is not able to control another person's feelings/response towards what you have done to them. I mean, if you can start calling people names, like "sundal", what makes you think that the other party cannot do the same. Of course, it is easier to tell the other party to not do anything and stoop as low as you but as I said, reflect on yourself first to understand why the other party does what he/she is doing. After all, we are in control of our own actions.
In the first place, one shouldn't be so unprofessional (if one says they're professional in the blogworld) and judge other people... I mean, why does one care so much if one blogger is so after freebies or that the person is an unemployed lazy bum? I for one do not care one bit as long as he/she doesn't come to me every other day, asking for money to support his/her lifestyle.
Well, I may not be fully aware of the entire truth but if it is out in a certain way in the blogworld, one just cannot blame other readers on their own opinions about the situation. That's why the best way is to keep mum and if it is just a small matter, let it be.
I always think that the best way to settle a dispute is to quickly apologise when one is wrong. The evidence speaks for itself. If you let the negative air continue to linger, you simply cannot blame the 'victim' to respond the way they do. What made you do what you did in the first place? Who are you to judge people? I mean, if one is so irritated or annoyed about what another blogger say about you, why don't you confront him/her instead of telling everyone in your blog/twitter space about that person, even months after? Why don't you just go to her or even tell her in an email that she blardy irritates you and you want an explanation to why he/she said what he/she said about you?
Respect is something earned not given. In order for people to give you that respect, you should respect others as well, no matter how popular you are or how much older you are. Name-calling is a no-no unless you are ready to face the consequences. I know I've done that once or twice the entire 5 years of blogging but I was very angry at the people I was aiming the entry at, but like I said, things will not happen the way they did if one is not provoked.
There's nothing wrong with being the bigger person, and I don't mean in body size. There's no need to be mean. Most importantly, there's no need to be so egoistic especially in the local blog scene because first of all, it is extremely small and secondly, if one is popular enough, there's no need to pay any attention to those small time individuals even if they are after freebies and being jobless. You can't please everyone and you cannot force every single people on earth to like you/like what you wear/like how you look. In the end, you know yourself and you are good in what you do... you have your family, and your family loves you... and friends will be there for you through thick and thin, not just because of what you can do for them.
That's what I think.