Yup, I have added book editing into my profile. I’ve done newsletters, ads and articles but this is the first time I got a book job.
So, while I was rushing for this suicidal deadline I committed and busy ‘layan’ing P Ramlee movie on Astro Prima one fine day, friends commented how nice it sounded staying home when I updated my fb status as that.
I dunno… everyone thinks what they’re doing is more difficult than others. As a quick response to the perception people have, I would say it is not as easy as people think. For one thing, I could easily lose my train of thoughts while doing work on the laptop as there are those frequent interruptions from the little cutie pie either wanting to be held, carried, fed, changed, or whatever it is she’d want when mommy is terribly busy. In between all these, you can never finish whatever you’re watching on tv… you’d either miss the middle part and not understand the rest of the movie or you’re so entranced with the storyline and all of a sudden, *poof*… you’re left with a hanging ending as you’re not able to catch it. But since it was a P Ramlee movie, I just love to watch them numerous times although I’ve known each scene or dialogue by heart ;)
Then, when the baby’s asleep can you rush to prepare your breakfast or lunch, do the laundry, bathe or whatever it is needed to be done.
Then too, I get tired before the end of the day as some people may forget how to maintain a low volume since it is not easy getting little jj to sleep and that I continue to work (housework) till late.
What’s more important is that I could pick up little jj and play with her when I need that break, I don’t need to rush out to express milk with all those bulky equipment and I could wait until she falls asleep by lying next to her everytime after her feed while studying her every gestures and sweet innocence.
So, yeah… I guess it is so much better being a SAHM because I can never imagine all that stress career women have to go thru everyday… you’d fall asleep all worrying about the next day and whatever it is you have to do, yet you must appear all happy and bubbly playing with a cranky baby who needs your attention after a long day.
Little jj always show her cranky side with the one I guess because she wants him to pick her up and play with her until she sleeps. And if I put myself in his shoes and remembering how it was with the little munchkin, it can be pretty stressful… you’re all tired from a hard day’s work and you have to cook, yet you know your baby needs all the attention. At least those days with the little munchkin, I was staying with my parents and don’t need to cook.
I love her hearty laugh that sounds so much like mine and the little munchkin’s laugh. But she can also be just as loud when she cries whenever she needed that attention from the one. And only with the one. Hehe.
She’d give me the widest most genuine smile after she’s full after a feed and she'd rub her eyes and left ear before she falls asleep while being fed.
I also love that piercing stare from that big round brown eyes when she looks at me and focus hard as if trying to memorise every single inch of the shape of my face… or that inquisitive stare when she suddenly realise the wiggly fingers of my hands are just similar to what she owns and she’d study and wiggle those tiny fingers of hers in return.
Then, I feel like I own a cuter pet. Instead of having a dog wiggle his tail when he sees you around, little jj flaps her hands and legs as if wanting to take off and fly whenever I come into the room while she’s playing on her own. And when she’s hungry, she’d flap just her hands. Gosh… she is so cute in whatever gestures she displays and I always wish the one could see all of it for himself because this is what a parent shouldn’t miss.
But then, who am I kidding… someone must work, for us to live comfortably, right? And I am glad that I could also contribute even as a SAHM with whatever jobs I’ve been getting.
I had just submitted the book editing job and told myself that I would never again commit to such ridiculous deadline but then I realised that all happen for a good reason… by the time I submitted the job, more jobs came pouring in with just as crucial deadlines. So, all is good and well then.
I guess no matter what you choose – being a career woman & mom or a SAHM, only you’d know what makes you happy. People have told me I won’t be able to stay home for long because it is just not me. But I guess I surprised myself too. You'd never know until you give it a go... I used my skills to my advantage that I am still able to work while staying home. I know not everyone could do this and not everyone could be a SAHM. Different people have different priorities and interests. I myself couldn’t imagine how much at ease I am with my new role as Home Minister because I couldn’t sit still back then after I delivered my first child.
Now, I just love staying home. So much so that last weekend when we went out, I pointed to something on the street and the one said that it has been there for awhile. Then, he stopped to add that oh, you haven't come out of the house for a week, have you?? Hehe. Seriously... as they say, macam anak dara ;P
I believe that whatever you choose, you’re contributing equally to the family. We’re different in the way we think… still, I have to sacrifice those things I have been so used to like shopping for clothes and shoes, and my usual facials, hairdo and spas. But, when I think of it then, even with an almost 5-figure salary I was living paycheck-to-paycheck. The more you earn, the more commitments you take in. Now, with just a modest lifestyle (and me still wearing most of my pregnancy clothes.. ooopss!!), I feel that I control my needs and wants better and I am just as happy.
Before, I used to think of all those people who'd say those clichéd statements, but I now have to agree that yes, when one sees those big innocent eyes of their babies, nothing else matters.
I had always wanted to experience being a full time housewife and never thought I had to put aside my plans to retire until another 3-4 years or so. But it is a delightful surprise that I am enjoying this to bits and it has been 6 months already.
I salute those who could go back to work after giving birth especially if one doesn’t rely on a maid and breastfeeds her baby fully. It’s mighty challenging, I tell you. Especially so in my situation where my princess refuse to be fed with a bottle. And, worse still, she much prefer to be fed on her spot, in our bed that no matter where we'd go, she'd rather starve than be fed away from her comfy spot.
Here’s hoping that the jobs would still flow in and I could continue stimulating my brains with the things I know I could do. Then, perhaps I could maintain working from home or even if I’d join the workforce much later, I’d still have that advantage in the communications industry.